Having online relationships,
especially in MMORPG (Massively Multi-player Online Role Playing Games) is one
primal experience for a gamer. In real life, relationships is about cuddling,
kissing, hugging and dating; in the cyber world, it is about saving your
partner or couple in times of difficulties, gaining EXP (Experience) together, wandering
that virtual world together, striving dungeons and quests together, and most
especially, gaining trust and royalty. I used to be in a relationship within a
game before. To be honest, it was as better (or sometimes even better) than a
real life relationship. Love stories are a lot romantic and magical in MMORPGs.
Since you are playing a “role” in that particular game, pre-weaved faith is
laid on you and your partner. Both of you are ought to play the life of your
avatars. But what are the pros and cons of this relationship? Can we consider
online love as realistic and as true to the real world relationship?
To be committed requires a lot
of effort and time. In the material world, open communication is not enough,
and partners should also give enough physical, emotional and material things.
In the world of gaming, everything you and your couple need is good internet
connection, a computer (nevertheless the platform of your game) and most
importantly time. According to the article “The Psychology of Massively Multi-User
Online Role-Playing Games: Motivations, Emotional Investment, Relationships and
Problematic Usage” of the site nickyee.com, Nicholas Yee says that, “Users spend on average 22.72 hours (n =
5471, SD = 14.98) each week in their chosen MMORPG. The lower quartile and
upper quartile boundaries were 11 and 30 respectively. The distribution showed
that about 8% of users spend 40 hours per week or more in these environments–
the equivalent of a normal work week.” With that huge amount of approximate time
consumed, a player can invest a dozen of relationship (any kind of relationship)
in one gameplay. Meeting up people online is a lot different than meeting up
people in real life. You don’t see how the person looks like, but you see how
he or she interacts with his/her comrades. And how does that lead to gamers
being couples?
There are cases that MMORP games have a system
that enables players to marry another player online. In the game DDTank (a
MMORPG I used to play), players can even make wedding ceremonies and bow oaths
together, just like a real marriage. Other games like Sims, avatars can also
make love and have kids. But not all games promote this kind of system. In
another game I played, avatars become couples not by the system of the game but
by the way they build up their relationship emotionally and psychologically.
For example, in the game Adventure Quest Worlds (AQW), I’ve had an assumed
couple. How will you classify that? Simple, if you and your couple have a
commitment. How to be committed? Well, to tell you frankly, there is no
specific way of gaining a partner in cyberworld. You can do missions, slay
monsters, chill in or farm gold. But the most important thing you need to do is
chat. Chat does the difference. Since it is an online world, you will communicate
via chat and nothing else. You can go overboard and reach out that person in
social media (Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram) but technically in the game it
is all just chat. The problem with chat is that it is not as precise as the
real talk you do in life. According to the article “How to Tell if Someone’s
Lying Online” of the site blog.womenshealthmag.com, Elizabeth Narins says that,
“But when you’re going back and forth
with someone and they take a bit longer than normal to respond, it’s not just
mildly irritating—it’s also a possible sign that they’ve lied to you.” Everyone
has the chance of altering their messages while chatting. Chances are that the
messages they give are just formulated lies. Plus there is no way of clarifying
if the thing he or she is saying true. I did alter myself when I had an online
relationship before. Maybe because the cyberworld is a place where you can
rule, where you can mould who you want to be.
You can be whatever you think your couple might like so it is very easy
to end up changing your image. Presumably, online relationship is a sum of 30%
truth and 70% lies.
It may
be dreamy and magical, but love without reality is not love at all. You may be
in love with the person behind those fancy avatars but neither of your two eyes
can tell if that person is someone you really love in the material world. I
suggest if you really feel this strange strong connection with your partner
online, don’t just be contented by chatting and seeing each other’s avatar;
arrange a meet-up, go grab some lunch, hang-out and spend some real time
together. Because at the end of the day, the cyberworld is just a world within
our imagination. Even though that life sucks, you have to face it and live it. As
long as you have each other’s back, no quest, no missions, no boss monsters of
reality will end your love for each other. Who knows, the both of you might
just realize that life is as easy as playing your game.
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